Sibling Group Adoption: Jealousy

I never imagined that I would be the jealous one.  Honest.  As parents, we expect that our children occasionally will get jealous of one another.  One may color better than another.  One may run faster than another.  As adoptive parents, we expected the children already in our home, both our biological children and our adopted daughter, would be occasionally jealous of the new children - after all, in their young eyes they think of us as "their" parents and that it is "their" home.  I did not, however, ever imagine as a mom and as a wife that I would be the one who could be jealous.

It's true.  While in Colombia I remember wanting Kevin's (my husband) time so badly!  I would walk into the room, see one or more of the new children on his lap or around him and that ugly sin of jealousy just reeled inside of me!  I didn't like it.  I didn't want it, but it was there nevertheless.

I am happy to say that as time has gone by, I have adjusted.  Ever so slowly as I personally get used to having 9 children and as I grow more attached to the newest five, the ugly jealousy feelings have faded away.  Now, I happily send the children to their dad (mostly when I am preparing meals in the kitchen and have a lot of Littles underfoot)   :)

If you are in the process of adopting, know that this may unexpectedly happen to you as well.  If it is already happening, know that it will get better.  The jealousy will go away - And... it is perfectly normal.

In His name,

Karen 

Sibling Group Adoption - What We (I) Didn't Expect

I have been wanting to write for some time now about a few of the things we experienced through our adoption of five children at one time.  It has been one year since we traveled to Colombia to adopt our 5 children, and one of the main reasons it has taken me so long to write this is that I don't want it to look like I am complaining.  My goal is to give a little bit more information to adoptive parents about what they may also experience.  Information about what the parent may feel that I didn't read about in any of the books or watch on any of the videos.  This is about the mom.  This is about the dad.  This is about the children that were already in the family when the new children were brought in.

There is a ton of information out there about the adoptive children, but this isn't about them.  It's about the feelings, frustrations, and the confusion that the rest of the family may well experience.  It's about knowing that "this too shall pass".  That it will get better.

I will title each post related to this as: Sibling Group Adoption: _________ and will fill in the blank with whatever topic I am writing about.  I pray that God's hand is in my writing - that what I write will help other moms and dads and their children to be just a little more prepared and to know... that it will get better.

In Christ,

Karen

Welcome!

Well... that stinks!  I managed to get this far with setting up a new blog and now that I can actually write something - I don't know what to say!  Ha ha ha!  I'm sure I will come up with something soon.  I actually think my problem is that there is SO much to say, I just don't know what to start with first!  I'll figure it out soon and get back to you.  But for now - Welcome!

In Christ,

Karen